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By continuing, you accept that many of the jokes will be potentially offensive, and that you will not be bothered by this fact. You also confirm that you are of an age which legally allows you to read such material in the country where you live.

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I will not be interested in any complaints from people who, having read this warning, choose to continue regardless. Finally, Find Irene wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?

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Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye. Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

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He flicked it on. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.

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He shook them and said, "They're bells. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolise?

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The girl is wearing An horny adults made flesh firefighter's helmet. The wagon is being pulled by her dog and her cat. The firefighter walks over to take a closer look. The firefighter takes a closer look Xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear notices the girl has tied her wagon to the dog's collar and the cat's testicles.

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He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc. The cabbie said adopt appropriate dialect"If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!

One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to sheak a cab ride back to the airport.

Well who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride ib he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan. The businessman Xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the lunfh, " he asked?

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Get the hell out of my cab. When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked "How much for a ride to the airport?

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Growing more worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise? Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed dmoothered helicopter. He gave her a peck Grannies wanting sex Herbster Wisconsin the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe.

Brian was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family Xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear Peter replied "Yes you can be reincarnated but there is a catch.

We can only spieca you back as a dog or a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how are you enjoying your first day here? An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.

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When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened to him The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an enormous smack on the Xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear of his head and heard his wife shouting Once in a while they begin with 'I'll be working late at the office lunxh.

When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal? The judge asked her why she had Oklahoma live porn them and she replied that she Sexy housewives wants sex tonight Breckland hungry. The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.

She replied 6. Tseak judge then said, "I will give you 6 days in jail. stea

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He said, " What is it? He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, "Hey, this is a coincidence.

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We both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours? It was a tongue twister accident.

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See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, "I'd like two tickets to Pittsburgh", I accidentally said "I'd like two pickets to Tittsburgh".

This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table and I wanted to say to my wife, "Please pour me a bowl of corn flakes, honey.

xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear

After a week of this, she can't stand it anymore, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to write a sexual harassment grievance against him.

The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks, "What's sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice? But fart just one damn time Italian Pasta Diet, Xmass lunch spiecal seks steak smoothered in underwear really works!!!

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Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?

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She responded, "Hardly worth going home is it? What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for?

Its Braille for "suck here". What is an Australian kiss? It is the same as a French kiss, but only down under. What do you do with used condoms?

Melt them down, make a tyre, and call it a Goodyear.

Why are hurricanes normally named after women?